Thursday, 13 April 2017

Funny Adult Jokes for Whatsapp Messages ,Status {Updated}

Looking for Best Whatsapp Jokes in Hindi And English with Hilarious Flavour of Non Veg and Adulthood.. Share free whatsapp jokes with your friends in social medias like whatsapp and facebook



1.Dad entered Son’s room and found him asleep on his books, tired of exam studies.
He walked closer to him..
and played with his hair softly, sweetly
and….
BAAANNNG $%^&* Slapped his face…
and said:
“Last seen on whatsapp 1 minute ago”


2.Ladki wale(ladke se): Beta kya kerte ho…?
Ladka: jee, Chief administrator Hun.
Ladki wale (khush hokar): Kaun si company mein beta…?
Ladka: WhatsApp per 2 Groups aur Facebook per 3 Pages ka Admin hun..


3.Taj Mahal ko dekh kar
bola shahjahan ka pota..
Taj Mahal ko dekh kar
bola shahjahan ka pota..
Aaj apna bhi bank balance hota
Agar dada aashiq na hota!


4.Aaj phir hamare group ke admin ne kamaal kar diya…
Wo savere savere bank me jaakar so gaya…
kyunki, waha likha tha ki
“Yaha Sone par loan diya jaata hai” 😀
Admin ke hath mein naya phone dekhkar
Dost bola:
Naya phone kab kharida?

5.Admin: naya nahin hai, girfriend ka hai!
Dost: Girlfriend ka phone kyun le aaya!
Admin:
Roj kehti thi, mera phone nahin uthate, Aaj mauka mila.. Utha laaya…


6.Hamare whatsapp group Admin bachpan se hi kitne buddhiman hain iska ek pratyaksh udaharan:-
Jab wo kaksha 5 mein the, to unke shikshak ne kaksha mein puchha:
Senior aur Junior mein kya antar hai?
Keval admin ne hath khada kiya..
Shikshak ne kaha: Shabbas beta, Batao?
Admin: Sir jo samudra ke paas rehta ho wo senior (see-near),
aur Jo chidiyaghar ke pass rehta ho wo Junior (zoo-near)!


7.Whatsapp group mein maun rehkar,
Sirf messages padhne walo ke liye
Zabardast offer!!!…
Bhootpurva PradhanMantri
Shri Manmohan Singh ji
Apna whatsapp group bana rahe hain..
.
Kripaya turant JOIN kar lein!!!
“First come first serve only!” 😉


8.WhatsApp chhote bachho ke diaper ki tarah hota hai…
.
Hota kuchh nahin,
Lekin har 5 minute me check karna padta hai!


9.Attitude of Girls :
When a Boy Sends Dirty SMS
.
She Laughs For 10 Minutes,
Forwards That to Her Friends
and..
Then Replies the Boy
I Don’t Like That Kind of SMS!!


10.Admin jalebi bech raha tha,
lekin bola raha tha.. “Aaloo le lo aaloo”
Santa: Yeh to jalebi hai..
Admin : Abe chup ho ja, warna makkhiya aa jayegi!
Intelligent hai na apna Admin!!


11.Admin par bijli ka taar gir gaya
Admin tadap-tadap ke marne hi wala tha ki
achanak…
Use yaad aaya ki bijli to 2 din se band hai..
Wapas uthkar, hanste hue bola,
Aailaa..
Yaad nahin aata to mar hi jaata!
Height of Smiley Uses
whatsapp-emoticon-joke
khana-whatsapp-funny-joke
1st Lady: Patni har janam me wahi pati kyun chahti hai?
2nd Lady: Taaki uss pati ko sudharne me lagi mehnat bekaar na jaaye

 12.Height of Smiley Uses










13.













14.1st Lady: Patni har janam me wahi pati kyun chahti hai?
2nd Lady: Taaki uss pati ko sudharne me lagi mehnat bekaar na jaaye


Funny Sharaabi Joke in Hindi

बीवी:
जो आदमी रोज शराब पीकर आये उसके लिए मेरे मन में कोई हमदर्दी नहीं है..!

पति:
जिसको रोज शराब मिल जाये, उसे तुम्हारी हमदर्दी की जरुरत भी नहीं है!!


साधू:-
बच्चा, तुझे स्वर्ग मिलेगा,
लाओ कुछ दक्षिणा दे जाओ।

लड़का:-
ठीक है दक्षिणा में आपको मैंने दिल्ली दी।
आज से दिल्ली आपकी हुई।

साधू :-
दिल्ली क्या तुम्हारी है ?
जो मुझे दे रहे हो।
लड़का :-
तो स्वर्ग क्या तेरे बाप ने खरीद रखा है,
जो तू उधर के प्लाट यहाँ बांट रहा है।

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